I’ll tell you what the biggest problem is in this country: a lack of application.

Americans are not stupid.  Critics of the U.S. look at our flawed education system, our embarrassingly futile media, and our troglodyte president, and they refer to us as a “stupid nation.”  But this is not true.

We are certainly not a “cool” nation, or a “sophisticated” nation, but this outward appearance does not mean we are a “stupid” nation, as many fail to recognize.  They judge by what we appear to be, which is a generally stubborn, generally blue-collar nation of people who dig NASCAR and think that things on network television are remotely funny and not the least bit pacifying.

And all of that may be true.

But, as I’ve learned, intelligence has nothing to do with appearance.  I have a friend who writes poetry and is in a rock band and dresses like a college professor; but he actually isn’t the least bit intelligent, or at least not to the extent which he believes himself to be.

On the other hand, I have other friends who think that the funniest moment in Billy Madison is when Adam Sandler chases a giant, imaginary penguin around; and they don’t find this funny in the ironic sense, and they don’t find it funny because they are under the influence of any hallucinogenic smoking material.  They really find it hilarious that a drunkard is chasing a giant penguin around on the television screen, just as they find the Bloodhound Gang song “The Ballad of Chase E. Lane” funny because, in the coda, the line “show ‘em them titties” is repeated several times.  And these guys, who also like sports, don’t read, and would never wear a necktie unless absolutely necessary, are all brilliant.  Many of them have scored in the low 30s on the ACT and are going to expensive colleges.

Critics of the US who argue that we are stupid are just shallow and more concerned with the vibe we give off than our actual intelligence.

But where they are correct in their criticism, and the point I addressed in the opening sentence of this piece, is that we, as Americans, are shitty at applying that knowledge to everything.

For example, most Americans have come to realize that smoking cigarettes is hazardous to one’s health and thus refrain from doing so.  But many who denigrate smokers also engage in eating fried, salty food with a plethora of additives and fat in it. 

Whether they are unaware of the shit in their food, or if they just do not care, is unknown.  But what is brutally apparent is that Americans are driven by certain knowledge or beliefs that they apply to some issues but not to others.

To all major issues the United States faces, there is a flipside in which we have done the exact opposite.

We examined the negative qualities possessed by John Kerry in 2004 (deceitfulness, indecisiveness, sheer stupidity) yet ignored the presence of those same qualities in George W. Bush and elected him president.

Our government took on Iraq supposedly as a “human rights” issue, yet ignored another human rights issue in Sudan and a thousand other tiny countries in the world whose names aren’t known by most Americans.

I don’t know if we do this on purpose or if we do this because we know no better, but it has to stop.  We can’t be a super power in the world, the police of the world, or any of the other idiotic labels we’ve placed on ourselves, if we are this bipolar on every issue.

For four years, the United States military has been killing Middle Eastern men and women because what they have supposedly done fits our parameters of what terrorism is; but what we have ignored, or perhaps, failed to connect the dots on, is that perhaps our actions fit those parameters as well. 

The United States is a nation driven by ideals and purpose, all of which seem to be applied to only some of the situations.  We tend to believe in compassion, unless of course you’ve fucked with us.  Then, the whole compassion thing is placed on the backburner for a while. 

Don’t let anyone tell you that you are not smart.  You are probably a very intelligent person, even if you tune into American Idol constantly or if you prefer 50 Cent to Six Pence None the Richer.  Don’t let these trolls tell you that America is dumb; we simply need to apply ourselves, whether that means recognizing the parallels between actions we condemn and actions we condone or if that means ignoring our desires to please ourselves when that mean ignoring our core beliefs.

You are intelligent; use your intelligence.